Good, Better, Best

I was asked to speak in sacrament meeting yesterday- well actually I was asked last Sunday to speak yesterday. I was able to choose one of the confernece talks by either the First Presisdency or Quorum of the Twelve. I chose Elder Oaks' talk entitled "Good, Better, Best". It turned out to be the perfect subject considering my week. :) Last week was one of the busiest I've had in a while. And that says a lot! I had to give up a lot- namely housework. This week should be a little better, but we'll see. Below is a transcript of my talk- mostly for my parents' reference. I often get in trouble :) for not inviting them to see me speak, so since that was not an option yesterday, this is as good as it gets!

Good, Better, Best
By Christie Jefferies
Subject based upon talk by Elder Dallin H. Oaks with the same title
October 2007 General Conference

**Look at me, look at me, look at me now!

You could do what I do if you only knew how.

I study the scriptures one hour each day;

I bake, I upholster, I scrub, and I pray.

I always keep all the commandments completely;

I speak to my little ones gently and sweetly.I

help in their classrooms! I sew all they wear!

I drive them to practice! I cut all their hair!

I memorize names of the General Authorities;

I focus on things to be done by priorities.

I play the piano! I bless with my talents!

My toilets all sparkle! My checkbooks all balance!

Each week every child gets a one-on-one date;

I attend all my meetings (on time! Never late!)

I'm taking a class on the teachings of Paul,

But that is not all! Oh, no. That is not all

I track my bad habits 'til each is abolished;

Our t-shirts are ironed! My toenails are polished!

Our family home evenings are always delightful;

The lessons I give are both fun and insightful.

I do genealogy faithfully, too.

It's easy to do all the things that I do!

I rise each day early, refreshed and awake;

I know all the names of each youth in my stake!

I read to my children! I help all my neighbors!

I bless the community, too, with my labors.

I exercise and I cook menus gourmet;

My visiting teaching is done the first day!

(I also go do it for someone who missed hers.

It's the least I can do for my cherished ward sisters.)

I chart resolutions and check off each goal;

I seek each "lost lamb" on my Primary roll.

I can home-grown produce each summer and fall.

But that is not all! Oh, no. That is not all

I write in my journal! I sing in the choir!

Each day, I write "thank yous" to those I admire.

My sons were all Eagles when they were fourteen!

My kids get straight A's! And their bedrooms are clean!

I have a home business to help make some money;

I always look beautifully groomed for my honey.

I go to the temple at least once a week;

I change the car's tires! I fix the sink's leak!

I grind my own wheat and I bake all our bread;

I have all our meals planned out six months ahead.

I make sure I rotate our two-years' supply;

My shopping for Christmas is done by July!

These things are not hard; 'tis good if you do them;

You can if you try! Just set goals and pursue them!

It's easy to do all the things that I do!

If you plan and work smart, you can do them all, too!

It's easy!" she said

and then she dropped dead.**

Does anyone know someone like this? Maybe she is referred to as ‘Polly Perfect', or ‘Molly Mormon’.

Gordon B. Hinckley said, “There is room for improvement in every life. … Regardless of our circumstances, we can improve ourselves and while so doing have an effect on the lives of those about us.”

What a challenge we have before us. Is it possible to be doing so many ‘good’ things, yet that is not the ‘best’ we could be doing? These are all good things she did. Many of them things the prophets have counseled us to do. I get overwhelmed at times thinking I have to do it all. But I can’t and I shouldn’t. At least not all the time. There is a time and season. It is up to us to determine which is the best for ourselves, our family, and our individual circumstances at different times in our lives. We need to prioritize. Maybe even give up some good opportunities to focus on the best things in our lives.

In our most recent General Conference, Elder Dallin H. Oaks counseled us in his talk titled “Good, Better, Best”. He states this:

“Most of us have more things expected of us than we can possibly do. As breadwinners, as parents, as Church workers and members, we face many choices on what we will do with our time and other resources.”

“We should begin by recognizing the reality that just because something is good is not a sufficient reason for doing it. The number of good things we can do far exceeds the time available to accomplish them. Some things are better than good, and these are the things that should command priority attention in our lives.”

Is it good to be room mom, or team leader? Is it good to belong to various community organizations? You bet. Is it the best? Certainly it is for some people. The challenge is deciding if it is the best for you, right now.

I know many in this room can relate to me. As a mom, I am constantly faced with tough decisions. Life at our house is a little hectic at times. And this past week was full of things demanding my attention. I had a difficult task determining which things were worthy of my time. I almost decided preparing this talk was not one of the best things I could be doing! But then I had a dream that I didn’t prepare my talk…and I decided it was, indeed, the best thing for me to do!

With Randy’s busy schedule, and me trying to juggle 6 children’s activities and needs, and our church callings, it leaves little time for much else. How is that precious time best used? I think my three year old has that figured out better than I do. One day, I got my 5 year-old off to kindergarten, and my baby was taking a nap. “This was my chance!” I thought. I decided I would finish up some housework and then take a few minutes for myself.

I was enjoying a little peace and quiet when Nathan burst into my room and declared, ” Mom. Hurry! It’s a ‘right now’ game!” How could I resist? I stopped what I was doing and played trains with him. It hit me at that moment. It really was a ‘right now game’. It was something that needed to be done then. It couldn’t wait. I am so thankful that he reminded me of the urgency to do that special thing with him then. Because, someday, he won’t want to play trains with me. Doing laundry is a good thing, but it is not going anywhere. It can wait. At that moment, playing with him was the best thing I could do.

Even some things we think our children need, are not always the best. Elder Oaks said this:
“In choosing how we spend time as a family, we should be careful not to exhaust our available time on things that are merely good and leave little time for that which is better or best. A friend took his young family on a series of summer vacation trips, including visits to memorable historic sites. At the end of the summer he asked his teenage son which of these good summer activities he enjoyed most. The father learned from the reply, and so did those he told of it. "The thing I liked best this summer," the boy replied, "was the night you and I laid on the lawn and looked at the stars and talked." Super family activities may be good for children, but they are not always better than one-on-one time with a loving parent”.

He also says, “Parents should act to preserve time for family prayer, family scripture study, family home evening, and the other precious togetherness and individual one-on-one time that binds a family together and fixes children's values on things of eternal worth. Parents should teach gospel priorities through what they do with their children.”

I know we have all heard this but, I feel it is worth emphasizing here. The number of families that eat dinner together at the kitchen table has declined 33%. That time is precious. It is such a simple thing that has a profound impact not only on our children’s academic achievement but also their psychological adjustment. It is also provides children with a fortification against smoking, drinking, and using drugs. My mom did a great job of getting us to sit and talk around the dinner table. We quickly learned that the first one up from the table was always asked to do the dishes! To this day, we all sit and talk around the table until long after the meal is finished.
President Gordon B. Hinckley has pleaded that we "work at our responsibility as parents as if everything in life counted on it, because in fact everything in life does count on it."

We are called upon by the First Presidency "to devote our best efforts to the teaching and rearing of our children in gospel principles. The home is the basis of a righteous life, and no other instrumentality can take its place in this God-given responsibility." They have also said that, "however worthy and appropriate other demands or activities may be, they must not be permitted to displace the divinely-appointed duties that only parents and families can adequately perform."

What about the other areas of our lives? Our service and our spiritual well being. Our education and our entertainment?

Elder Oaks warns that our church meetings and activities should concentrate on providing spiritual sustenance. We need to simplify and prioritize. He says, ”Make sure that the essential needs are met, but do not go overboard in creating so many good things to do that the essential ones are not accomplished Remember, don't magnify the work to be done—simplify it The instruction to magnify our callings is not a command to embellish and complicate them. He said, ”What is most important in our Church responsibilities, is not the statistics that are reported or the meetings that are held but whether or not individual people—ministered to one at a time just as the Savior did—have been lifted and encouraged and ultimately changed.”

Elder Oaks tells of Mary and Martha in Luke 10:39-42

It was good of Mary to want to serve. But at that time, it was better to learn the gospel from the Master Teacher, himself.

Again, Elder Oaks counsels: “Consider how we use our time in the choices we make in viewing television, playing video games, surfing the Internet, or reading books or magazines. Of course it is good to view wholesome entertainment or to obtain interesting information. But not everything of that sort is worth the portion of our life we give to obtain it. Some things are better, and others are best. When the Lord told us to seek learning, He said, "Seek ye out of the best books words of wisdom"

With so much media and new technology abounding in our society, it is hard not to get caught up in these things. I have found they are actually addicting. To hear Elder Oaks state that ‘some things are not worth the portion of our life we give to obtain them’ makes me stop and think. Wow! I am giving away a portion of my life! Is it time well spent? Is this this best I can do? When I stand at the judgment seat, I want to be proud of how I spent my life. Did I do my best to repay Christ for His life He gave for me? Or did I waste it on cheap entertainment and useless information?

I pray that we can each stop and think next time we are faced with a decision. Is it good? Can it be better? Or is this best? Pray for guidance in your daily lives. Pray for knowledge of the best use of that portion of your life. So when you face Christ, you can know that you did your best.
I say these things humbly in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

**A Girl in a Whirl by Dr. Sue (aka Vickie Gunther)